Thursday, February 28, 2013

Five Reasons You Shouldn't Get Drunk

Approaching women at night can be an anxious and exhausting experience, and it's natural to have several drinks to blunt feelings of social pressure and facilitate interpersonal exchange. That said, here are five reasons to curb your alcohol consumption while grinding out approaches at the bar or club:
  • Saves money: Going out already represents a significant opportunity cost, since you're devoting a block of time to your game with no guarantee at a reward, instead of working out, working on your business idea, reading a book, learning a language, etc. Why compound that loss with spending upwards of $40-50 (if you're lucky) on watered down mixed drinks or beer of a brand you don't like anyway?
  • Health benefits: Since cutting down on drinking, I have rarely gotten sick. My lifts have gone up steadily, and my body fat percentage has decreased. Alcohol has been shown to reduce testosterone levels, which will not only prevent you from getting the most out of your workouts, but in the long term will make you more sluggish and less likely to approach. And therefore more reliant on alcohol to reduce your inhibitions.
  • Productivity: If I get drunk at night I do not sleep well, and am next to useless the following day independent of any hangover. This compounds the aforementioned opportunity cost by flushing the next day down the toilet.
  • Heightened social awareness: if you're relatively sober and talking to a girl who's had a few drinks, your mental alarm bells will be more sensitive to something that isn't right -- e.g. personality disorder, "too drunk to consent", proclivity for lying/drama. It's admittedly more difficult to run caveman game, but you will be better equipped to take advantage of social cues and more perceptive about easy targets. Note: if you are naturally introverted or shy, this can sometimes work against you.
  • Increased confidence in the long term: The ability to talk to and attract beautiful women while sober represents a leveling-up of your game and gives you rock-solid confidence to draw upon in future approaches.
The first time I forced myself to go out alone and sober, it was as if I was witnessing a play. Think of your drink as the prop that you need to fit into the storyline, and treat it as such. Take infrequent sips, hold it at your side, and refill occasionally if necessary. The drink should be the minimal investment or cover charge to get into the game without looking like an abstaining weirdo.

Another strategy is to have a few drinks, but consume them more slowly over the course of the night. This allows you to get a slight buzz without fully invoking some of the drawbacks above. Nobody you approach has knowledge of how much you've had or how fast you're drinking, and anyone in your group who criticizes you for drinking slowly should be dropped from your crew. 

This approach is not without its disadvantages. Realize that by adopting this M.O., you're going against powerful social pressure to drink to excess, and are likely to incur the curiosity and even ridicule of some friendly acquaintances. There is also a chance that your game will initially take a hit as you adjust to the higher level of anxiety and the clarity of thought that comes from a brain not clouded by alcohol. Don't worry -- this will pass, and you will be better for it.

You should still go crazy and get your drink on when the situation calls for it. But if you plan to be in the game for the long haul, a policy of alcohol austerity is clearly the best long-term play. At worst, you are making a positive lifestyle decision for your brain, body, and wallet. At best, it may rocket your game to a new level.


  1. I don't drink and I've noticed that I actually have an advantage over most of the other guys.

    As the night goes on, most dudes start shutting down. In contrast, I still have a lot of energy and can keep approaching and being social.

  2. I agree 100%. While I'll still have a drink or two at a pregame with guys are girls in my friends' social circle, once I get to the bar I'll limit myself to two more at maximum. The first couple trials were difficult, but I adapted to approaching without the false courage of alcohol. This makes day game a possibility and truly opens the pool of women you're willing to approach.